Be Blessed!

SCREAM!!!

There... I feel better.

It is so frustrating when my husband forgets to tell me something on his schedule. He is consistantly busy 60+ hours a week and then I think he has some time at home with me, just to find out he forgot to tell me he is going out of town to spend time with his daughter. I have no trouble with him having time with his girls, I just had other plans that I have to rearrange or do myself. In fact, he sees his girls so seldom that I prefer not to go along so that he can have Daddy/Daughter time.

So I feel a bit better. As soon as I redo my plans I will be fine.

Mindfulness Handout 2

Taking Hold of Your Mind: "What" Skills

OBSERVE

• JUST NOTICE THE EXPERIENCE. Notice without getting caught in the experience. Experience without reacting to your experience.
• Have a "TEFLON MIND," letting experiences, feelings, and thoughts come into your mind and slip right out.
• CONTROL your attention, but not what you see. Push away nothing. Cling to nothing.
• Be like a guard at the palace gate, ALERT to every thought, feeling, and action that comes through the gate of your mind.
• Step inside yourself and observe. WATCH your thoughts coming and going, like clouds in the sky. Notice each feeling, rising and falling, like waves in the ocean. Notice exactly what you are doing.
• Notice what comes through your SENSES - your eyes, ears, nose, skin, tongue. See others' actions and expressions. "Smell the roses."

DESCRIBE

• PUT WORDS ON THE EXPERIENCE. When a feeling or thought arises, or you do something, acknowledge it. For example, say in your mind, "Sadness has just enveloped me." ... or... "Stomach muscles tightening" ...or... "A thought 'I can't do this' has come into my mind" ...or... "walking, step, step, step..."
• PUT EXPERIENCES INTO WORDS. Describe to yourself what is happening. Put a name on your feelings. Call a thought just a thought, a feeling just a feeling. Don't get caught in content.

PARTICIPATE

• Enter into your experiences. Let yourself get involved in the moment, letting go of ruminating. BECOME ONE WITH YOUR EXPERIENCE, COMPLETELY FORGETTING YOURSELF.
• ACT INTUITIVELY from wise mind. Do just what is needed in each situation - a skillful dancer on the dance floor, one with the music and your partner, neither willful nor sitting on your hands.
• Actively PRACTICE your skills as you learn them until they become part of you, where you use them without self-consciousness. PRACTICE:

1. Changing harmful situations
2. Changing your harmful reactions to situations.
3. Accepting yourself and the situation as they are.

*From Skills Training Manual for Treating Borderline Personality Disorder by Marsha Linehan (c)1993 The Guilford Press

Unfortunate Carpenter...

Wisdom for today...