Hello There Everyone,
It has been a long time since I have written an update on my life. I apologize to those of you who desire more from me than my daily inspirational posters, however I am proud of myself for staying as consistent as I have with them. When I started this blog I thought I would be giving you a step by step of my recovery from mental break down. Well, as it went from mental break down, to mental break through, to a life of everyday ups and downs with a deadening of my emotions, I have realized I have done this more for myself then you. Don't get me wrong. I am glad it has spoken to many people.
I am writing today to let you all know that though the medication has some what deadened my emotions, Life is Good. Despite the unwanted dramas of living in our times, being married, and being 51, I am happy. Some of the dramas I have dealt with this summer are, being pulled in front of when I was going 55 mph, yet not getting an injury other than a couple bruises. My main computer is acting up, thankfully I have this back up. A husband that is more human than I wish to handle at times. A very strong desire to live alone again.
The living alone thing comes from having such a difficult time be Me when I am married. I feel like my priority should be the marriage and I tend to loose my lively personality. Yet I am learning. Becoming stronger and more determined to rediscover myself. I have done this through finding a new job and being creative in many different ways. Still I long for a space, (more than just my corner office) to say is mine. I realize I am no spring chic any more and many people would say that if I leave this marriage I may never find a man that cares for me like Ron does. Well, that is the point, I wish and need to find a way to care for myself again. Be independent with many friends to make sure that I don't go hungry or lonely. I believe I have those friends now, and I am sure I will make a few more when I feel free enough to pursue my interests more.
With all that said, I will thank you for following my blog. I hope it has brought you some sunshine or helped you see things in a better light. Namaste
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