As I spoke to my therapist the realization came to me that, if I wasn't feeling as safe, and loved, and cared for as I am. I would not be able to work on my self. I would be distracted by the everyday duties one has to care for one's self. In that caring that I am receiving from my husband, his family and my little sister I find my self angry with them, avoiding them. How dare they care so much that I feel safe enough to face my monsters.
There have been many persons in my life that I pushed away for that very reason. I was not ready to go into the dark, into the places my mind has up till now felt better left undisturbed. Now is the time to tiptoe into the dark. If I were to go in full force I may not return, so I will proceed with caution and the help of my loving husband, Ron, his family, my little sister, my chosen family of friends, and my therapist.
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